How To Build More Patience in 3 Steps

Source | Raw Pixel

Source | Raw Pixel

I’ve met a few acquaintances in this journey that has responded positively to my patient nature. But the truth is, I wasn’t always the patient type. My attitude was always a “let’s hurry up because I don’t have time for all of this.” But this very attitude led to a multitude of harsh by-products like temper, aggression, and the random headache that physically manifested as a result.

I was always in the rush to get things done for the sake of getting to the end product as fast as I could with less BS as possible. This destructive path led me to having to deal with the dark shadows of my soul. It was in need of a breakthrough. In the present, my patience has dramatically increased to the point where others have noticed. But like every art, this sculpture took time so below I share my three tips on how to develop patience:

1. Hyper-Awareness

My first step towards controlling my lack of patience was realizing that it was an issue. Mainly because that lack lead to more frustration that physically left me drained. Ask yourself the next time you find yourself losing your patience, “Why do I feel so impatient?” Do you feel like you lost control in a situation? Are you demanding too much? Is it possible that you are suffering from anxiety?

When you invite a mental conversation filled with figuring out how your impatience commences, you are moving through the day in a healthy way towards self-awareness. It is the quintessential first step towards defeating impatience before it starts. Once you recognize when you become impatient and take the step to reverse it, you can avoid the negating actions that follow; actions that can hurt you and others.

2. Time doesn’t exist so just enjoy the now

I was guilty of this: rushing to get to a goal. So, when it came to developing patience, it was no different! I learned that to overstand every lesson, I had to approach it from a sacred space of acknowledging the little joys in the present. This meant having to realize how grateful I am to acknowledge my shortcomings and be proactive towards evolving for the better.

I also learned that time doesn’t exist and the construct was something that holds no weight in this journey. This allowed me to not fuss if I show up to work late one morning after being stuck in traffic. It allowed me to become indifferent and calm if a cashier was taking their time with the customer before me. What’s the worst that can happen? I always question myself in these moments because the more relaxed I am, the more I can go in the flow. There is nothing more liberating than that.

3. Patience in Perspective

Once I developed this liberation of flow, I started to become more grateful. I put a conscious effort into putting everything into perspective. I surrender. I release the need to control. Don’t get me wrong, there are times where I’ll get a random impatient thought but I stop it before it consumes me. I ask myself “would this feeling matter five weeks from now?” The answer is always a “no”. The lack of patience holds no merit.

As a result, the lack becomes replaced with a heap of patience but it takes practice. Even going about your day to day routines will present you with ample opportunities to practice patience. Even if it is that annoying co-worker who takes their sweet time using the copier machine when you need it or the slow driver in front of you who switches lanes at the same time as you when you get tired of the slow commute, switch to patience.

The more you practice it, it becomes relatively easier. Go with the flow and put patience on auto-pilot.